A defense of Orlando

I despise my hometown in Seminole County, Florida, so I naturally think I hate Orlando too. But then again I don't really know shit about Orlando.

Matt sent me this column by Orlando Weekly music editor Jason Ferguson, which is the perfect rebuke to people like me: There is stuff going on in Orlando; if you haven't looked, don't bitch.

Good for Ferguson. I have that “Orlando is boring” attitude, but of course I also never leave my fucking house or do anything when I’m home. And from working at the Sentinel, I think it’s a pretty good area for hard news. Lots of wacky shit going on. And the scene is growing, so I hope the economic growth doesn’t just bring more tourists, yuppies and demoralized service-industry workers. I think one reason I didn’t explore Orlando much in high school was that most of the people who seemed to be into the scene (namely the emo and indie type kids, if that actually means anything...) also seemed like annoying pricks (most of them were). And maybe I was jealous of them too. Of course I do like the Enzian (not Orlando but close enough to be part of the scene), and I’ve seen some good shows at the Social and Will’s Pub, which annoy me (but only in the same way Chicago venues like Metro and The Vic annoy me—full of hipster kids with shit-eating grins and dumb clothes).

Of course, Ferguson dare not defend "LizArt," an atrocious public-art program in downtown Orlando (pictured).

But Seminole County is still a hell hole. Or at least that’s the only explanation I have for Matt and I always ending up at fucking Denny’s, Steak-n-Shake, Books-a-Million and/or Applebee’s.